Thoughts on Life and Culture
My heart hurts,
a feeling hard to describe,
as if I have been rejected,
and wounded inside.
My hopes destroyed,
as reality becomes clear,
what I wanted will not be,
yet what is I shall not fear.
Thunder and lightning flash and roll,
God moves, his purposes he unfolds.
In his plans thus will I trust,
and not in my own, who am but dust
Anxiety, pain, anger, and loneliness, all my heart has recently known.
These my constant companions, their seeds of affliction have sown.
Thus I come to thee, for I have no where else to go.
Water these seeds with grace, that in your time they might grow.
Use their fruit to proclaim your goodness, that others might know the sweetness I have tasted.
Use them also to nourish my meekness, thus shall my pain not have been wasted.
Teach me not to despise my life’s lot;
I ask only that I might not live, and love thee not.
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